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November (Late) Update from the VP

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  • lpvan
    replied
    Originally posted by udeer
    Report: Harassment, trolling.

    Perhaps someday you won't break my heart.

    Leave a comment:


  • lpvan
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    Originally posted by udeer
    Report: Harassment, trolling.

    You could use some new material, for a lovable troll, you're very limited in your abilities.

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  • lpvan
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    Originally posted by udeer
    Report: Harassment, trolling.

    Back to the dungeon

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  • lpvan
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    Originally posted by udeer
    Testing for Alter complaint - could not post

    Testing testing, I'm just suggesting, you and I might just be the best thing.

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  • lpvan
    replied
    Originally posted by sujitp81 View Post
    Wadappened to December and Jan updates VP? we are not paying you to sit on ur idle ass

    Uhh, yes you do

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  • sujitp81
    replied
    Wadappened to December and Jan updates VP? we are not paying you to sit on ur idle ass

    Leave a comment:


  • lpvan
    started a topic November (Late) Update from the VP

    November (Late) Update from the VP

    Hello,

    Let me first begin with apologizing for posting my monthly update 2 days late. Please rest assured I was busy reconciling and ensuring all of your wonderful top ups were properly documented and deposited to the proper bank account at Cayman Island in Trust. You can't imagine the amount of work I had to do as I shook my own martinis watching my bill counters sift through endless pots of $20 notes. To prevent future inconvenience, please send $100+ bills.

    We had a wonderful November with our fantastic Black Friday specials. To please our wonderful players we offered a wide selection of events and purchasing opportunities, including, but not limited to: our wonderfully regular priced Black Friday Deals, our newly equipped nerfed Star Chaser, the Wheel of pumpkins and Our esteemed Interstellar Merchant, who sometimes is hard to find during events, rest assured we continue to break him out of jail as those fraud charges are just fake news.

    During the month of November I had the amazing opportunity to, as normal, travel for "business" in order to further grow our sinking Empire. During this time I spent some of my valuable time in China, visiting our esteemed developers, producers and other wonderful tunnel vision folks in an effort to enhance our game offerings and further advance our mutually selflessly selfish ambitions. We had many fruitful discussions and discussed many new ways to excite our players, from bringing back a wide array of old bugs to enhancing our existing platform to allow for a new assortment of unexpected amazing repetitive bugged features. I know I shouldn't discuss our unimplemented ideas, but to generate some excitement, ok, fine here we go, we are planning AN OVERHAUL of our in game top up feature, allowing instant swiping via a reader on your keyboard, to expedite this, we ask please email our wonderful Support with your shipping address and a credit card to pay for shipping and handling. Please include a screen shot of your credit card for verification purposes.

    To all of our wonderful inactive players, we feel that 2018 will be an inaction packed year, and just when you don't think you could be surprised anymore we promise to keep shocking you with our fantastically inept ideas!

    Until next top up,

    Insincerely,
    Mike Hunt, your VP

    P.S. Happy Holidays to all of our credit card holding players!
    Last edited by lpvan; 12-02-2017, 11:51 AM.
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